Sunday, April 13, 2008
Third Degree Stress
Yep yep that is what I'm going through currently. This will probably last me the whole entire week. You know like third-degree burns? Yar. Something to that effect.
When this week ends I'm going to make sure I get my well-deserved break. Now I'm living in a nightmarish sort of reality where I wake up in the mornings and feel a sense of dread, a monster at my back called "3 Assignments due this week". Well, I'm going to follow the advice of the Great Leap Forward propaganda of three years of suffering and a thousand years of happiness. At worst a week of hard labour and several weeks of hitting my head on walls. Other than that I'm glad to report that my sanity is still intact.
So I was reading Jess' blog about lousy boyfriends, and it just hit me all over again that Love, however much it has been praised and romanticised, is ultimately Blind. We put Love on a pedestal and worship its perceived perfection that we neglect to see the chinks on its seemingly pristine surface. It's kinda like worshipping a doughnut but forgetting that there's a HOLE in it (I know, bad analogy, I'm so full of it right now).
I've always wondered if, one day, my turn came to fall and hit my face first into Love, whether I'll be as Blind as so many others I've come across. I sincerely hope I won't be, but I'm sure others who have fallen into this trap have also regarded themselves as being able to see clearly while in Love. Maybe it's up to our best friends to guard our well-being. After all, friends are there to provide a shoulder to cry on after breakups, and to spew bad things about the person who broke up with you. They help you on the rebound as well, I guess. I dunno, never had the experience of being dumped (yet! O___o).
There should be laws regulating this kind of thing. And women living in modern society should have more backbone than to let a guy bully them (IMO). Unless of course the guy is someone they sincerely care for. In which case they should just have a huge crying jag and THEN counter-dump the partner in question. Like, leave him a voicemail message whereby you scream at the top of your voice for about ten seconds, then slam the phone down. Now THAT'S attitude.
Hey hey, lemme see if I can come up with the Ten Commandments for the Treatment of Girlfriends:
1. Her Word is Law. Come hell or high water. (Of course if she asks you to dance barefoot on a cart of durians, then in this situation common sense should prevail)
2. Never patronise or condescend to her or make her feel stupid.
3. Be sensitive to her moods.
4. Always put her welfare before yours (because she'll likely do that anyway) and because you are in a better position to sustain damage.
5. Chivalry is NOT dead! Don't be a coward, be a gentleman.
6. Do NOT give her lame presents which show you didn't put any effort e.g. generic photo frames, generic birthday cards. MAKE HER FEEL SPECIAL, make her feel like you KNOW her likes and dislikes. ***REMEMBER HER BIRTHDAYS*** (This is irregardless of the fact that you may have short term memory or Alzheimers. It's do-or-die.)
7. Always tolerate her teasing. In fact, constantly attempt to make her smile.
8. NEVER EVER raise a hand or a voice to her. EVER. Because then she'll have a reason to take you before a Court of Law. (Y'know, "To Violence Against Women, Australia Says No")
9. Maintain physical contact if reasonably possible. She appreciates the sense of security it provides.
10. Keep trying to get to know her better; she'll grow on you.
Somemore important guidelines:
11. Acting "cool" is, in fact, NOT "cool" at all! Instead, it makes you look like you have a major self-confidence issue.
12. Do not assume that she will be vividly interested in Counterstrike strategies, Internet protocol or World of Warcraft economics.
13. Never brag. Refer to 11. Instead, what you SHOULD brag about, is her. :)
14. Try to eat as messily as you can, so she won't feel bad about digging into her food. (Again, slobbering all over your food like your pet bulldog is never a good idea. You might be a hygiene hazard to her long-term overall health)
15. Insist on paying for the bill, but if she steadfastly refuses, let it go and do NOT see it as a blow to your ego. EVER.
16. NEVER spend longer in front of a mirror than her. Cuz if you do, that just goes to show that you love yourself more, eh? ;P You should be busy helping to curl/straighten her hair or fetch her makeup instead. (Hey hey, no complaints! She's doing all that to look good for you!)
17. Never be impatient while she's on a shopping spree. Instead, give her constructive advice on the clothes she picks, and maybe do some browsing of your own. (Goodness knows how many pieces of decent clothing you have in your sad, sad wardrobe anyway)
18. Girls always appreciate good listeners, so do keep an ear out for any problems she might give voice to, or anything else she has to say, for that matter.
19. Looking at other girls while on a date is just BAD BAD etiquette. I can totally understand the activity of appreciating beauty, but doing so at her expense is in bad form.
20. Last (but NOT least), if you feel the relationship isn't working out, gently break up with her. Do NOT procrastinate as this will make the break more painful for her. TAKE NOTE: ALWAYS explain to her the reason for the break up. ALWAYS blame yourself, instead of her, if things don't work out. DO NOT EVER make her feel like she is the reason for the break up. She already has her share of insecurities without you adding to the fray.
Phew.
I was on a roll there. ^^
Cya sometime next week, when I'm no longer inundated by landfills of assignments! <3
...is what I said. Savvy?
10:09 pm
friends
June 2006